the dissident frogman

14 years and 10 months ago

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Burning holes at the top of the world since 2002.

the dissident frogman

Necrothreading much?

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Numbers, numbers: in what might well be a sign of the close coming of the end of times, Jules Crittenden's first blog anniversary is just a couple of days away from my fifth, which is today.

Seeing that we're physically several thousands miles away however, the getting-drunk-together-at-the-closest-titty-bar has to be postponed. Indefinitely. Life sucks, and then you die.

Talking about dying and of how many years, it seems that all the entertainment we'll get to celebrate our blogs' birthdays is provided by Al Gore the Witchdoctor rather than some anonymous yet lascivious pole dancer. No glittering thong and high-heels -- and therefore not the same effect on our respective tender gender fiber, but still: what a boob.

He's mixing a bit his numbers, and just listening to him it's a bit hard to figure out when exactly the World Is Coming to an End: sometimes he gives us less than 23 years, sometimes as little as 34(1).

I hope you enjoy the stunt though. Relax, and don't forget what Al Gore the Witchdoctor is carefully not telling you. Non exhaustively: that his computer models are regularly proven wrong, that we're coming out of a little Ice Age (which tends to explain why it is a bit warmer than it used to be), that even if the Arctic ice is melting, the Antarctic is getting colder (meaning that global warming is not even global), that CO2 is a consequence, not a cause of warming, that if some glaciers are melting, others right next to them are advancing, and that compared to the 1930s and 1000 AD, it's actually getting rather cold these days.

Again, that's just a tiny sample of the long list of inconvenient facts the Nobel Prize witchdoctor is conveniently leaving aside.

Al Gore is playing on stupid or uneducated people's irrational fears, a game of power and control that's as old as the first stone age shaman who realized that rather than risking to hurt and tire hunting dangerous animals with the men of the tribe, or breaking his back gathering dull roots and boring veggies with the women, he could make out imaginary dangers, foretell unforeseen consequences (floods, storms, droughts, etc) for the tribe's most basic actions, lay the guilt on each of its members -- and explain that he can help out, if only the people accept to provide him with a good share of venison. Plus a bit of salad, carrots and potatoes on the side. One needs fibers for a healthy diet.

The only thing that changed is that you are more likely to be far less stupid, and a lot more educated than the average stone age tribesman.

So don't let the Witchdoctor fool you. Global warming is normal warming.

Note: If you're reading this through the RSS feed, you're not receiving the man-made global warming denier terrorist mime video alert. Shame that.
  1. When every hitchhiker knows the right answer is 42.

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the dissident frogman

I own, built and run this place. In a previous life I was not French but sadly, I died.

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The Wise knows that Cities are but demonic Soul-tearing pits that shall not be entered.

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Comments thread (41)

2977 - tinga-tinga

Comment author avatar

Congratulations on your upcoming anniversary!

And many more we all hope for your blogging and miming!

Here's another tidbit. Mt. Kenya and Mt. Kilimanjaro are the two farthest points on the planet Earth that can be still seen from each other. Both are 19,000 feet +, and both are free-standing mountains (no range) at the equator. BOTH have glaciers at the summits.

ONLY Kilimanjaro's glacier is mentioned by AL Gore. Mt. Kenya's glacier is NEVER mentioned. WIth the nearly identical circumstances, one glacier is photographed as shrinking - blamed on global warming. SO if that was the case, it should be that same for Mt. Kenya, but Mt. Kenya's glacier has no minimal change.

1) Both glaciers are frozen at a steady rate of about -3 degrees FARENHEIT. (it's the equator - no winter spring summer or fall there) That's about 35 degrees BELOW freezing temperature. Melting does not occur at those altitudes (19,000 feet- roughly 6,000 meters ) or at those temperatures. Due to the height and thin atmosphere, it could warm at sea level and still have no effect on the temps at 19,000 feet. Therefore, any statement that there is MELTING at the summit of Kilimanjaro is FALSE, and relies totally on the ignorance of the listener.

2) The area around KIlimanjaro has been in drought conditions for over a decade. The snow accumulation is less thanks to lack of precipitation. Mt. Kenya has better annual rains. The glacier on Mt. Kilimanjaro can lose mass only through sublimation into the cold, dry air.

3) AL Gore's career has been in politics. He has no education in science of any kind, and did piss poor, flunking level work in the education he did receive, exactly what still remains unclear. Then logically, rationally, when he speaks about "environmental" issues, then he always speaks politically, not scientifically.

Outstanding article with actual, real, proper scientific data at The American Scientist - The Snows of KIlimanjaro.

2978 - HeckBoy

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  • HeckBoy Auburn, AL USA

To Mike H.

But... and how... so that noise is just... And I thought it was because he was wearing corduroy.

2979 - JR

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On the bright side, Le Beaujolais Nouveau est arrivé!

2980 - Ben USN (Ret)

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  • Ben USN (Ret) Washington State, USA

Ha ha! Excellent video, D-Frog! Only a moron could possibly believe that weather is supposed to be static and unchanging (kinda like believing that regressives like the Gorickle is a progressive. Just plain nuts).

Congrats on your blogiversary! I'll celibrate with you by raising (and drinking) an ice cold grog (not limited to one, of course)!

2981 - Beth

Comment author avatar

Bonne blog anniversaire, Froggy!

I am SO using "global warming is normal warming."
Love the video, but that water needs a celebratory shot of scotch in it. ;-)

2982 - floridasuzie

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  • floridasuzie Florida

Happy 5th Anniversary DF! Love the new video very much!

PS Does anyone else have this problem and know how to solve it....When I read a topic, then the comments and decide I want to add a comment myself, I have to go through the whole process twice before it allows me to type? IOW, click on topic title, comments, post - add a comment, then all those things again? Why won't it let me type the first time I go through all the clicking process? Maybe I should click Home first? Or maybe I do that already, I don't know anymore my brain's shot.

2985 - G.W.C.

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  • G.W.C. Colorado

DF,

Love the video. I just have one thing to say:

Scotty! I need more power to my hair dryer!

I can't do it Captain, the warp coils don't have an outlet, and even if they did, Al Gore stole the dilithium crystals! He said they gave off to much CO2!

But Scotty, we're in space!

I know that Captain, and you know it too, but, if you gave him one brain cell, it would be the first time in his life he ever had two to rub together!

2988 - SisterToldjah

Comment author avatar

Something else to warm our hearts regarding The Goracle will be the upcoming Nobel Peace prize concert, which will be held in honor of the the windbag next month on the 11th, the day after the prize is "officially" awarded. He's also being considered as a possibility for Time's "Person of the Year" cover.

While this year has indeed been one "win" after another for Gore, I take heart in the fact that he still doesn't have the one thing he's craved ever since he began his political career: the presidency.

G.W.C. wrote:

Scotty! I need more power to my hair dryer!

I can't do it Captain, the warp coils don't have an outlet, and even if they did, Al Gore stole the dilithium crystals! He said they gave off to much CO2!

Hmmm. Have you tried an ionic hair dryer? It works wonders on drying hair quickly, so maybe it'll work just as well on ice cubes, too ;)

To DF: Please check your PM's when you get a second, will ya busy guy? :)

2989 - Mike H.

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  • Mike H. Spokane, Wa

Cobaltberet, ah, you begin to discern, but the corduroy does help. ;)

Now can somebody tell me what the heck is wrong with Glowball Warming? With perpetual summer Algore wouldn't have to wear all of those corduroy suits... well maybe he could cut it down to one at a time. His carbon footprint would definitely be smaller and so would any other prints that he left anywhere. I'm clueless...(well, let's not get into that).

2990 - Lady Cincinnatus

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  • Lady Cincinnatus Ohio & Kentucky

Bonne Blogiversaire!! I dedicate General John Starks 1809 toast to our beloved Frogman, "Live free or die. Death is not the worst of all evils." This should be toasted with a good Kentucky Bourbon Whiskey such as 1792 Ridgemont Reserve.