the dissident frogman

16 years and 11 months ago

Attack of the Muslim Eating Warnimals

Can't sleep, monkey-headed dog will eat me.

the dissident frogman

Necrothreading much?

Article content

Article copy

Verily, the cunning and cruelty of the Crusaders know no boundaries.

"Word spread among the populace that UK troops had introduced strange man-eating, bear-like beasts into the area to sow panic.

(...) UK military spokesman Major Mike Shearer said: "We can categorically state that we have not released man-eating badgers into the area.

(...) One housewife, Suad Hassan, 30, claimed she had been attacked by one of the badgers as she slept.

"My husband hurried to shoot it but it was as swift as a deer," she said. "It is the size of a dog but his head is like a monkey," she told AFP.»
"In recent weeks, intelligence operatives have arrested 14 squirrels within Iran's borders," state-sponsored news agency IRNA reported. "The squirrels were carrying spy gear of foreign agencies, and were stopped before they could act, thanks to the alertness of our intelligence services."

Iranian police commander Esmaeil Ahmadi-Moqadam confirmed the report, saying that a number of squirrels had been caught bearing foreign spy gear within Iran's borders.»
Ynetnews adds that "The use of rodents has not been documented in the past.", a claim easily debunked and yet another example of sloppy reporting and Zionist bias towards honorable Iranian police commanders and intelligence operatives.

France's secret animal warfare program.
Photo ©2007 the dissident frogman
(click the thumbnails for a larger view)

I addition, I have personally witnessed another secret experiment, for which I can and shall henceforth provide photographic evidence. At a French facility that will remain undisclosed, dogs are routinely made to sleep with (presumably man-eating) badgers, in order to produce unnatural hybrids against nature, endowed with dreadful ferocity and inbred Islamophobia, that could be unleashed on France's reckless Muslim minority to quell future riots.

Plus, if they wag their tails at you, your penis will melt(1).
  1. In case you do not have a penis to boot, for reason of being a woman perhaps, then expect your wardrobe to melt instead — This casts a new light on one of History's biggest mystery, to the lasting embarrassment of all men who rolled eyes, sighed loudly in disbelief and prepared their checkbook whenever they heard wifey's desperate cry "I have nothing to wear!"



the dissident frogman's avatar
the dissident frogman

I own, built and run this place. In a previous life I was not French but sadly, I died.


To reveal my email address, find the 1st  number in the code and enter it in the challenge field below.


The Wise knows that Cities are but demonic Soul-tearing pits that shall not be entered.

More options


Commenting as

You're presumed to have read and abide by the comments policy, but here's the gist of it:

Silly or serious, you are responsible for what you write. I slay trolls. Thank you for your comment.

Comment author avatar
Max. 300 characters
An email address is required.
It is never published or shared.

As in "valid" email address...

Once posted, your comment can't be edited. Feel free to (ab)use the Preview!

The Wise knows that Cities are but demonic Soul-tearing pits that shall not be entered.

Comments thread (11)

2162 - Grimmy

Comment author avatar
  • Grimmy Where I'm at.

Round 2 of the warnimal invasion will look like this:

Where does the light go, when the light goes out?

2163 - Iwo Gina

Comment author avatar
  • Iwo Gina Maryland

OMG!!! DF - you are TOO funny!! When do we send in the Ninja Ferrets?

Iwo Gina

2164 - floridasuzie

Comment author avatar
  • floridasuzie Florida

Secret Squirrel was one of my favorite childhood cartoons, are you saying it wasn't true? I'm crushed.

2165 - floridasuzie

Comment author avatar
  • floridasuzie Florida

Grimmy, I love those LOL cats.

Gina, Ninja ferrets! ROFL!

2166 - Ms.ManChow

Comment author avatar
  • Ms.ManChow Maryland

It must have been these squirrels from Germany.

Soo, when they arrest these squirrels and Manbearpigs, what sort of rewards do they get in heaven for killing them? Pork rinds? Virginal rat pies?

If we were fighting Puerto Rico, we would release the Chupacabra to create fear and mayhem.

Next, the armed Yeti!

...mercy to the guilty is cruelty to the innocent... Adam Smith

2167 - Iwo Gina

Comment author avatar
  • Iwo Gina Maryland

These are the same folks that are messing about with nuclear materials. Oh. My. God.

Iwo Gina

2168 - Mike H.

Comment author avatar
  • Mike H. Spokane, Wa

Are we speaking of Rocket J. Squirrel and Bullwinkle P. Moose? Are we speaking of the place that we could learn fractured things like fairytales? Um....Are we speaking of a couple of centuries ago?

I read a book about it once. ;)

2170 - Ali Mentary

Comment author avatar

well, well, well. Excellent! I guess i found the right post to start with.

2171 - Valerie, Texas

Comment author avatar

Now this is a squirrel you do not want to mess with:

She's from Texas, of course.

MIke H., careful now, you might be taking a ride in the Way-Back Machine

with Mr. Peabody and Sherman!

2172 - Mike H.

Comment author avatar
  • Mike H. Spokane, Wa

Yes'um miss Valery, it feels like it. ;)