the dissident frogman

15 years and one Month ago

Millennia of civilization, and then Ashton Kutcher

the dissident frogman

Necrothreading much?

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The big event in the social-media bobosphere at this moment is that Ashton Kutcher [He of the sinister North-Korean State-propagandish video "I pledge (to worship and obey the Dear Leader)" fame] has "won" a "race" against CNN by reaching the one million followers1 mark to his Twitter thingy.

In effect, this means that the little twerp has found more than a million of other twats willing to lend their continued attention to his fascinating "tweets" under the nom de plume "aplusk", such as:
lol RT @gembuild: @aplusk will RED put his foot in your ass if you LOOSE?
Or:
I think I've acquired some type of virus that is taking down my wifi... sabotage? lol
Or even:
Thanks dude lol RT @jeremybunner: i think ppl are following CNN bc they think @aplusk is a douche.
Douche, indeed — at least that one makes sense.

That's just a sample. I pulled the hard work of rummaging through Kutcher's seemingly endless flow of retarded teenage syntax so you don't have to. Now slowly awake to the realization that there is, at this moment in mankind's (globally) glorious history, more than a million of our fellow naked bags of water and calcium with just enough thinking matter2 to follow that kind of blabber every day, several times a day.

Gives you the creeps yet? Wait, that's not all: realize that this is the kind of folk — Yes, I mean the cretin who graces the world with such insightful snippets as "Thanks dude lol i think ppl are following CNN bc they think i is a douche" for instance — who are, in effect, the bulk of what we cannot avoid to call the international elite, for lack of a better... Well, elite.

If you're American, it's even worse: you also have to realize that they are running your country at this very moment. I feel your pain.

The so-called "web 2.0/social media" movement is a venture capital-wasting scam brought to us by a crowd of bleeding-heart iPoded/iPhoned Socialist socialites, but there is no escaping reality: with public performances such as Kutcher's "tweets" we are reminded, once again, that their leaders are dribbling imbeciles, advancing in front of a rank and file made up of dull, conformist and unthinking human2 automatons.

And that is good news — at least in the long run, for as far as the short run is concerned, there is little hope left when you know that Oprah just joined the herd of twats. Or is it Twits? Whatever.
  1. Yes, followers. These people are all about the cult of personality. Their own — when they successfully convince themselves of having any — or The Obama's.
  2. Yeah, I'm using the term very loosely.

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the dissident frogman

I own, built and run this place. In a previous life I was not French but sadly, I died.

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The Wise knows that Cities are but demonic Soul-tearing pits that shall not be entered.

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The Wise knows that Cities are but demonic Soul-tearing pits that shall not be entered.

Comments thread (7)

4085 - unknown jane

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I try not to think about it, and when I do the idea of a Christian type Judgement Day/Armageddon doesn't seem like such a bad thing after all, or a large asteroid strike. Of course those things would suck, but one could argue that at least it would be quick and/or one would no longer have to suffer such things as Ashton Kucher, Demi Moore, or their zombie fans (who will likely, in the long run, have the same effect on the planet as a vengeful god or a surly space boulder).

4086 - privatei2

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Oh hell. I still had hope for western civilization until this moment. The knowledge that 1,000,000 people follow that jack ass' juvenile comments has plunged me into despair. This calls for some serious drink and pansy chocolate martinis ain't gonna cut it. Wish I knew some moonshiners.

4087 - bonmotdot

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  • bonmotdot Deep in the Heart of Texas

If I was at Gitmo, that's how they'd torture me. They'd read that crip-crap from Ashton's empty cranial sac to me all day. I'd snap. In half an hour.

4088 - unknown jane

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Sorry there Private -- wish I could help you out. We have several "hobbyist distillers and brewers" around here. It isn't all that hard to get started; perhaps a new hobby for you?

4089 - cremationexpert

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  • cremationexpert Studio City, California

Oooofff! I live in Los Angeles (native) and have to witness this crap on a daily basis everywhere I go-godless bullsh*t - It has come to the point that I would now like to move if I had an opportunity...

4092 - Ms.ManChow

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  • Ms.ManChow Maryland

Heck, at least Kanye West realized he's a gay douche fish after South Park skewered him. Kutcher hasn't a clue. Neither do his douchey followers understand their abject doucheyness. Kutcher is douchetastic.

Twitter is barely tolerable when Jim Treacher does it, even then, I only read what he posts on his blog that is on the internet.

Now I think I'll go take a slug of whiskey and cry.

...mercy to the guilty is cruelty to the innocent... Adam Smith

4096 - TooTall

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I would like to think (but I'm probablly wrong) that this doesn't represent support for him but rather a disdain for CNN.